The SPCA won't like this one!

... you are never too big for commercials.

Cloudy with a chance of meatballs...

... get out of my chair! Didn't you see my name on the back?

The rain continues in NY, but I still went out for a cigarette a few minutes ago. It's funny, I hardly ever smoke at my house, and only have 3 or 4 at work (two breaks and then 1 or 2 on my lunchbreak), and RARELY smoke in my car... but throw me at the diner with a cup of coffee outside on the patio and *BAM*, half a pack like that. And when I say "that" I also snapped my fingers.

So, while I was staring at the cigarette smoke in the calm rainy air, I started to see things. Most people who see things talk about seeing the lady Madonna or a flash from their previous life or something like that. Me? I just saw some cool looking random swirls. You seem disappointed. Don't be! Random swirls are cool to look at. Most people find them entertaining to stare at. Some people even find them inspiring.

The funny thing about swirls is this. There seems to be no pattern, no method to the mayhem, and no life (lacks a heart and all that crap). However, and I'll be the first one to tell you this, swirls are actually affiliated with the government. You'll notice that American swirls will lead to thoughts about self-improvement, artistic creation, and ingenuity. However, go to France and you'll discover that swirls there cause feelings of hatred, sadness, and boredom. Don't even get me started on the Chinese swirls.

The color wheel is spinning!

...fiery explosions will make any drama worthwhile!

In todays events, it turns out that the color purple is actually the color green. Unfortunately, the world will never accept that as the way things are. Instead, people will put a blindfold over their eyes. These are the same people who once thought that the Earth revolves around the Sun and that Pluto is actually a planet. Thankfully, scientists finally came to their senses and backed my theory that Pluto was not in fact a planet, but a dwarf planet. And to think... all of those textbooks that now have errors. If only they listened to me. Think of all those dead trees. You people should be ashamed of yourselves.

When I finally hit the big screens, my first move will be to promote CFC's in hairspray and big block engines in all cars. That's right folks, I am here to tell you how things truly are. By the time I get through with you, you'll understand that the true danger to the Ozone layer is the making of crappy pizza.

Welcome to all of my future loyal readers!

...never try to step in front of a moving vehicle without having your stunt double at hand.

So, here marks the beginning of a brand new journey. Now, I have a blog on livejournal, and I even have one on myspace, but blogger is all brand new to me. I'm not into the whole "talk about everything you touch, taste, hear, or smell" journals, so you really won't find that here unless it's something uber exciting.

It's currently 61 and raining in NY. It's currently 88 and clear in Hollywood. Guess where I'd rather be?

I'll leave this post short... and on these words... the world according to Hollywood is much more interesting than the world according to some other person's blog, so read mine instead.